Sameer Gudhate presents the Book Review of This Book Won’t Teach You Parenting: But It Will Make You a Better Parent by Riri G. Trivedi and Anagha Nagpal

If you’ve ever stood in a supermarket aisle with a wailing toddler, frantically wondering whether you’re doing this whole parenting thing “right,” you’ll know the silent truth — there is no one right way. That’s exactly where This Book Won’t Teach You Parenting: But It Will Make You a Better Parent steps in. Written by psychotherapist Riri G. Trivedi and parent coach Anagha Nagpal, this book doesn’t hand you a parenting rulebook. Instead, it gently hands you a mirror.

Both authors bring years of experience helping families navigate not just tantrums and teenage moods, but the deeper layers of cultural expectations, emotional baggage, and generational patterns. What’s unique is their Indian lens — because let’s be honest, raising kids in a culture where grandparents, societal pressure, and WhatsApp family groups all have a say is its own adventure.

The book isn’t about fixing your child; it’s about understanding yourself. Through real-life stories, practical exercises, and thoughtful reflection prompts, it guides you through the journey of healing your own childhood wounds, managing your emotions, and building connection over control. From toddlerhood to the tricky teenage years, the advice is age-appropriate but never rigid.

Think of it less as a lecture and more as a late-night conversation with a trusted friend. The tone is compassionate, warm, and non-judgmental — no guilt trips, no “perfect parent” pressure. The anecdotes are refreshingly real, not Instagram-filtered. The simplicity of the prose means you can pick it up in stolen moments — during a school pickup wait or while the kids are asleep — and still walk away with something valuable.

At its heart, the book champions connection over control. It encourages you to break unhealthy generational cycles, regulate your emotions before reacting, and see your child as their own person rather than a “project.” One line that stayed with me:*“Your child is not your project. They are your mirror.” That alone can change the way you show up as a parent.

The book is neatly divided into sections by stages of childhood, with clear subheadings and reflection points. This makes it easy to dip in and out without losing the thread. It flows naturally, moving from self-awareness to practical strategies without feeling like a heavy manual.

While the book tackles common parenting challenges — screen time battles, social media worries, teen relationships — the underlying theme is universal: parenting is as much about raising yourself as it is about raising your child. It’s about presence, empathy, and learning to let go of perfection.

Some sections hit hard. The exercises on reflecting on your own upbringing had me revisiting moments from my childhood I hadn’t thought about in years. And yes, there were a few lumps in my throat. The book doesn’t shy away from talking about trauma, but it approaches it with care, making it feel safe to explore.

The book shines with an honest, relatable tone that meets you exactly where you are, skilfully balancing modern parenting challenges with the unique nuances of Indian cultural realities, and offering practical guidance without ever being prescriptive.

If you’re looking for a strict, step-by-step “how-to” guide, you might wish for more structured answers. But honestly, the beauty here lies in its open-endedness — because no two kids (or parents) are the same.

I’ve always believed that parenting is a partnership in growth. This book affirmed that belief, giving me tools not to “manage” my daughter, but to understand her — and myself — better.

This is the kind of book you don’t just read once. You keep it within reach, because different chapters will speak to you at different stages. Whether you’re a parent, planning to be one, or simply curious about the human side of raising humans, this book will nudge you towards more empathy, connection, and self-awareness.

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